Witch Hunts and Tabloid Scum

So I read that a man from the UK with trans history has given birth and that the gutter press are searching for him. It’s become quite a frenzy to be honest. There have been some shockingly transphobic articles from the Daily Mail’s Bel Mooney and The Telegraph even changed their headline overnight to a more provocative scarehead. The Sun even went as far as encouraging it’s readers to ‘shop’ this new family to them for financial gain!

How is this even newsworthy? A person has used their body to create another life, does it really matter how, who or what their history is? This kind of thing happens every day. So fucking what that this person is trans? I can guarantee you that there has been more than a few trans women who have procreated in the past so why the big fuss about a trans man doing it?

What is the UK press obsession with all things trans? Why the hell should the simple fact that someone is trans-whatever make them a piece of public property when all they are doing is trying and live their lives like every other member of society?

It is basic schoolroom bullying at it’s worst. Pick on the odd one out. Deride, belittle and persecute them until they break then move on to the next target and repeat.

Bel Mooney, Dominic Mohan, Richard Alleyne and every other member of the gutter press in the UK are nothing more than children picking on others because they have nothing better to do with their pathetic lives than spout their bigoted, transphobic bullshit under the veil of journalism. They bring shame upon the profession and should issue public apologies for their behavior.

This comes after a week when Trans Media Watch gave evidence to the Leveson Inquiry giving examples of how the press has hounded and persecuted trans people simply because they were born in the wrong body.

THIS IS NOT IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST.

LET THESE PEOPLE LIVE THEIR LIVES

Every person on this planet has the right to become a parent and it is not a newsworthy event when a person with trans history exercises that right.

I copied this next part from Fox’s blog and I encourage you to spread the word.

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Currently “The Sun, and apparently other tabloid newspapers are trying to find any transman who is about to give birth or who has given birth post-transition.”  ”There will be a lot of journalists poking around trying to find out names.”
Natacha Jessica Kennedy of Trans Media Watch asks for ‘every trans person, and all supporters of trans people need to stand shoulder-to-shoulder on this and keep quiet, no talking to the press, no disclosures, just a magnificent solidarity in silence.’
If you are being hounded by any journalists, you can contact Trans Media Watch for support and advice: or the PCC 24 Hour emergency advice line: 07659 152656. This applies to anyone who believes they have become the focus of press attention in a manner that breaches the Editors’ Code of Practice

Is My Fame Vacuous?

I personally hate it when I meet someone on the street or in a club and says something about me being famous or a celebrity. It makes me feel like one of those seemingly vacuous people that sell photos of their wedding or newborn child to a magazine or go on TV to moan about press intrusion into their lives or their latest marriage break up. I don’t feel “famous.” I was on a late night Channel 4 show, which a relatively small number of people watched and then moved on with their lives but it’s left me with a legacy that I can’t ignore.

I still feel like the same person that I was a year ago, I still drink too much Red Bull, stay up till 4am on the internet and wish I could have more confidence. I agreed to be part of My Transsexual Summer mainly because I was just moving to the UK and I didn’t know anyone here, much less knew another trans person or know how really to start my transition. Being “famous” was never a motivation for me and I was vaguely hopeful that some people would take some sort of inspiration from me taking part but it’s this that has become my greatest underestimation of the summer.

Last weekend I went on a trip with the other girls from MTS, Karen, Donna, Drew and a man called Paul as we were invited to open a club night in Birmingham and to attend a night in a gay friendly pub in Bletchingley, Surrey. Now, I was and continue to be uncomfortable with the idea of putting myself on a pedestal above others as if I’m some kind of Elton John-esque “star” and I think it showed, I was self conscious, nervous and a lot more reserved to how I am normally but it was a conversation I had with someone afterwards when I was having a drink to calm my nerves that hit me like a freight train.

This person approached me and begun to tell me how she had came out to her family as trans after watching me telling my mum on TV. She said that seeing how I had summoned up the courage to be honest with the people I love had made her realise that she needed to do the same and she thanked me for taking part in the show. There was a tear in my eye as I hugged her and wished her the best for her life.

The next night in that tiny but lovely pub in Surrey and with the snow falling hard outside I met another young trans woman who, she explained, had only lived fulltime as female for a month. She was painfully shy and we talked about ways to help her boost her confidence and stop worrying about whether she passed as a woman when she was walking down the street. I promised her I would put her in touch with some friends of mine and said we would be able to support her and help her out in any way we could.

Now, I have noticed a couple of comments on Facebook and Twitter from people questioning why I am attending these club openings, events and various things that I’ve been invited to, like I’m milking my “fame” or something. To begin with, even though I put this down to petty jealousy, I thought these people may have had a point, I do not wish to become some sort of “career transsexual” who trades on being on a trans TV show like some Z list celebrity personalities seem to try and milk the fact that they were once on Big Brother or something.

But last weekend has made me aware that the seven of us HAVE made a difference to some peoples lives, we have actually inspired people, given hope to some people, opened some peoples eyes and continue to do so. We still have that opportunity to help some peoples lives and still give hope to some that their personal situations can improve and it’s for this reason that I won’t feel bad turning up to a nightclub in a blacked out people carrier and standing on a stage answering peoples questions as long as I still feel like I am making a difference for the good

One Small Step For Transkind

I came across a problem that no doubt countless other trans folk have fought with last week while I was finishing off changing my name with the various companies and official documents that still bear my old name and I came to my phone contract with O2. I walked into their shop in Brighton and presented the assistant with my Deed Poll and she gave me the address to send it to which I duly did. Just as I was about to leave my flat for the weekend I checked my mailbox and saw this letter from them.

O2 seemed confused… A simple name change being made into such a kerfuffle! At one point in the letter they talk about a gender change, which, by the way was never mentioned when I asked for my name to be changed, and later in the letter they tell me when I provided them with the “certificate showing gender change” they asked for, they’ll update the name on their records….?? And what is that bit about “the copy of the Deed Poll that you’ve produced need the signature and stamp of the authority”? (sic) The Deed Poll I have was good enough for my bank, good enough for my national insurance number and good enough for everyone else I’ve had to use it with.

When I called the number to try and explain that I could only get a Gender Recognition Certificate after at least two years of living as female and, at the moment, all I wanted to do was to change my name with them!

So I decided to ask the Twitterverse as I’m connected there to lots of other trans folk who I hoped would be able to help me out with this problem. A few people mentioned they had problems with O2 in the past but I also received a Tweet from someone who happened to work for them who, as luck would have it, was at that same time was working on a project for customer services to make it easier for customers to change their name! I love Twitter!

The next day after confirming some details with O2 I received a phone call from the lovely man who contacted me to tell me that the Deed Poll I sent them was enough and not to worry, he would sort everything out. Wonderful!

Here’s the mail I received from O2 about it:

Hi Sarah,

Just to confirm what we discussed on the call earlier. I have updated your account to reflect your proper name and gender. I am really sorry that you encountered so many problems in trying to do this. Going forward, we are going to improve our internal processes so that other trans-people do not have to face the same issues.

Thanks

D**** J******* and the Systems Thinking Project Team

O2 Customer Services.

So hopefully from now on any trans person wishing to change their name with O2 will have an easy time of it!

That’s a good result in my book J

Screw You And Your Stereotypes ( I Will Never Be A Girly Girl)

I had a conversation today with someone that ran along the lines of many, many conversations I’ve had over the years, it went something like this:

Me: “I love that the new Top Gear is on, they have the new Mclaren MP-12C and the new Lamborghini!!”

Person: “You’re not very good at this being a female thing, are you?”

What???

I mean, really??????

When I left school I was an apprentice mechanic at the Rolls Royce dealership in Jersey, long ago I lost count but I’ve owned at least 50 cars since I was 16, I am inexplicably and unashamedly obsessed about an internal combustion engine attached to four wheels and a seat. Since when does gender have to do with that? 

When I was on day release from the garage at the local college there was a woman in my class studying with us, and to be honest, she was way better a mechanic than I ever was. What is it with people assuming that to like something you have to be a certain gender? Today I met a woman who’s boyfriend is obsessed with pink, Lauren, one of my best friends from home can kick my ass at Playstation, I’ve worked on building sites next to female plumbers and carpenters and I’ve met men who are more obsessed with makeup and beauty than I am about cars.

When will people realise that every time they try and pigeon hole one gender into a certain role they are just reinforcing outdated and needless stereotypes? This kind of thinking has to stop right now. Some young boys like playing with dolls. Some young girls like playing rough with the boys her age.

Why does one activity or another have to be gendered? Why can’t we all just BE?

Just because I am female it doesn’t mean I have to live up to what you may think I should do. I like cars, video games and finding out how things work, this doesn’t make me any less female. I also like makeup, shoes to die for and watching Loose Women but people choose to ignore this when they question me about my love of cars.

As I mentioned in a previous blog this reinforcement of stereotypes starts at a young age and I believe it takes a certain type on mind to see around it, analyse everything, ask why, question motives, this is the only way that we can embrace and promote gender variance and freedom of expression as nothing more than personal wellbeing.   

The Thing About Gender Is...

 

It’s been a while since my last blog (again) as I’ve been concentrating on writing my book and general boring life stuffs. Next month is going to be a pretty cool one though, I’ve been asked to go to a few support groups and charities to give talks to about my experiences as an early transitioner and give my views on lots of different things. One thing that has got me thinking though is the people at Schools Out have asked me to come give my input in a discussion panel.

It got me thinking about how gender stereotypes are reinforced from a very young age in schools, whether it be about uniform, queuing up after lunch break, playing with toys or the whole netball is for girls and football is for boys rubbish. There is so much being ingrained in these young children that I fear that societies acceptance of non-gender binary expression may never improve.

The sooner people figure out that teaching children the fact that it’s ok to express their gender however they feel, the better. Instead of reinforcing the differences between children we should be encouraging their freedom of expression. Teachers should be teaching children the fact that gender is a spectrum and not everyone falls into either the stereotypical male or female role. If we want children to grow up into well rounded, open minded adults then they need to learn how to question everything about their thought processes and the greater world around them and make informed decisions about how they react to things.

Another thing I’ve been doing since my last blog is giving up smoking. I’m at 9 days now, using one of those inhalator things… I never thought I’d have ever even tried to give up but last week I just decided to stop and went to the doctor and all of a sudden I’m a non smoker! Well, when I was out for a drink with a friend on Friday I confess to smoking a couple but they just tasted like shit which I think is the right reaction…

I broke my cars gearbox somehow too over the last couple of weeks so am confined to my flat and only going out on the bus every couple of days but at least it’s concentrating me on writing my book. You didn’t know I was writing a book? Well I am. It’s about my experiences this summer coming out to different people and the journey I went on from day one of living fulltime as female. I’m looking for a publisher if you know anyone who can help? Ideally I’m looking for a publishing house to handle printing as well as promotions as I have no experience in it at all… Contact me on Facebook or Twitter if you think you can help!!

Yo Ho Ho!! Mary Chrimbo

 

Christmas!!! It’s that time of year when everyone gets all excited and stuff and forgive me for being a bit bah humbug but each year I just don’t get what all the excitement is about… See, I was raised in a very religious family and we never celebrated Christmas so it wasn’t until I was seventeen that I had my first proper Christmas and that was spent in a pub lock-in with my then girlfriend and the only festive thing we did was get really drunk…

I guess over the years I have learnt to enjoy it more and my favourite one was when I was in Amsterdam for a couple of weeks. Maybe it was the ‘local’ cigarettes I was smoking but for the first time in my life I actually felt festive! The air was cold and crisp and every where I looked there was tinselly decorations with the odd Dutchman cycling past whistling Christmas songs. My friend and I were staying in a dingy hostel on some dodgy street until some more friends arrived and we got to share their hotel room. On the big day we ate pancakes and did some sightseeing.

The point I’m rambling towards though, is, Christmas is what you make of it. For me it means enjoying time with friends. Each year my friends back in Jersey would all get together for a big meal and to get nice and drunk and I will miss that this year but my life has started a new chapter so it’s time to look forward and enjoy what I have achieved these last few months.

So whatever you get up to and whoever you spend it with, I hope you enjoy it. :)  

Government Ministers and Lesbian Pubs (My Week)

Its been a while since my last blog and I’ve been slacking a little in the online part of my life… I’ve just had such a lot going on recently, when I sit down at home I just want to chill out…

What a few days it’s been though! Last week I was woken up by a phone call from someone who said they were from the Home Office!??!! All kinds of thoughts flashed through my mind, what did they want with me? Were they going to deport me back to Jersey for crimes against fashion? Did they want to nominate me for Prime Minister?

As it turned out the Equalities Minister, Lynne Featherstone was launching the first ever government plan for transgender equality and had asked for someone from My Transsexual Summer to help promote it. So there I was at 6am having not slept because I was out with the others from MTS the night before and I knew that if I went to sleep I wouldn’t wake up in time, downing Red Bull in the hope that I would be able to appear awake on breakfast TV… It all went really well in the end and I was asked to the actual Home Office building to have a meeting with the minister herself. Who would have thought, me, a girl from a tiny island near France, having a natter with a top government minister!!! Lynne seemed like a really nice lady and was clued up on trans issues. Here’s a link to the actual paper the government produced. http://www.homeoffice.gov.uk/publications/equalities/lgbt-equality-publications/e-bulletin/e-bulletin-4

Although it’s great and all that the government are taking steps for the progress of transgender rights, from what I understand from this paper, it’s not actually agreeing to do anything. It just seems like they’re saying “let’s start thinking about doing something” It seems a bit of a cop out to me.

Why are they not doing something to promote gender variance in schools? Discrimination and bullying comes from not understanding and there should be more done to educate people.

Why do trans people feel they have to fight to get treatment on the NHS? Failure or a long wait for treatment is seriously detrimental to the wellbeing of people who are transgendered.

I could go on but I’m trying to keep this post short.

In other news, I have got myself a part time job!! I now work behind the bar at the Marlborough pub in Brighton. Apparently it’s a lesbian bar? I had a shift there last night and it went really well, luckily I remembered how to pull a pint and the night flew past in the end. I really enjoyed getting out there and meeting some new people and I hope it’s the start of more shifts and maybe a proper job.

I’m also over a quarter of the way to my target of £2000 on my fundraising page to fund my hair removal. Yay!! A huge thanks to all those who have donated, I have booked my first consultation for Monday and I’ll know a bit more about the treatments I’ll be getting after then. I’m really looking forward to starting, I hate having to shave my face every day, its ripping up my skin and if I haven’t shaved on a particular day my confidence takes a real hit if I have to leave the house. It costs a fortune in razors too!! Heres a link should you wish to donate <3 http://www.gofundme.com/anfyg

I’m off to go and see Karen tonight for her birthday so I’ll leave you with that. J